Coloring inside the lines with a cornflower blue crayon. Cornflower was and always will be my very favorite shade of blue, and as a little girl I'd color every object that shade of blue. When I ran out of objects, I'd move on to the sky, plants, floor, and eventually I'd ignore the lines altogehter and scribble the entire page cornflower blue.
Blue princesses dancing in blue dresses, complete with matching blue tiaras, blue shoes, blue skin, and a blue prince in a blue suit with blue boots, together in a blue ballroom with a blue crystal chandelier.
Lights dot the hills heavily, then thin out into no lights at all, admitting defeat against the darkness. The hills are black, with dark silhouettes of trees sticking out at the top, a single piece cut out of black construction paper against a cornflower blue backdrop.
"Something about contrast," I say. "I love that shade of blue."
"It is a very lovely shade."
"That's what is important in life."
She nods slowly, and she knows that I am not referring to the color, but the appreciation of color. The appreciation of the contrast of the hills against the sky, the appreciation of our desperate attempt to light it all up, to make ourselves feel that we understand it.
"You have a great sense of social obligation, and that's so rare. I really respect you for that."
I smile a bit.
"We do have an obligation to make things better, to try to fix what is wrong for our future generations," and I pause. "I believe that's what makes us human."
Lights pass by, fireflies in the window. Memories flick and flitter through in a similar fashion. I remember being four again and being so excited to go to the park to play that when we finally got there, I tripped over the curb and split open my knee, sucessfully bleeding all over everything. We had to go home because the bleeding wouldn't stop, and I only cried because I'd not be able to play. I still have the scar."A study in negative space," I say to no one in particular, and we are silent.