index | archives | notes Friday, Jan. 13, 2006 9:52 p.m. << [ Socially Acceptable ] >> It's depressing how these days I can only make the words flow when I'm thinning my blood, depleting vitamin K, killing brain cells, call it what you will, in the end it's still self destruction. And you, the unspecified, general, you. Constantly replacing me with the stronger, better, faster. Those who bear such little resemblance to me that I find I'm tearing away at myself, screaming things like, "Why am I so unloveable?" and "I want my fucking book back." It's not going down easy, tonight. It lingers in the back of my throat and I have to be awake at noon, and I want to keep talking to fool myself into thinking I have something to say to someone who's listening, instead of this pseudo-anonymous lecture to a nonexistant student body. Is this eloquence yet? Is this grace, is this beauty, is this charity? I'm donating blood next wednesday. I am right handed, and it is my left arm that's unfit for viewing. Give me a minute and I'm sure I can make this sound more pretentious. << | x | >> whatiscopyright.org