On the floor of our friend's house, his head against my leg when I tried to get him to sip the water, when he spat it back up on my jeans and I just laughed, that's when I knew I really loved him.
And he on his back, black hair against the harsh white light of the bathroom, his pale hand against my cheek and him saying, "My Amanda, my beautiful Amanda," that's when I knew he loved me too.
I miss you more than I knew.