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Thursday, Jan. 17, 2008
3:26 a.m.
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I fell asleep on his lap again, two nights in a row. The attention or him, I'm not sure which one is the one I genuinely like, or if I even really like either of them.

Today my boss told me I was in the top five percent of the people who took her teaching class, and that I should teach special needs kids at the elementary school level. She said I'm like her, I can't do routine, and I need the stimulation that would give me.

I'm supposed to get my stuff back tomorrow after work. Victory? On my way back to my car this morning, the walk of shame, I realized it doesn't matter if he's happy with me anymore, just that I want him to be happy. If he's happy alone, without me, then that's okay. That's all I've ever wanted for him.

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