I am being dishonest in general.
The last couple of months I've found myself sneaking in little half-truths and denials everywhere I can.
Honesty has to start somewhere.
Let's try again.
I spent my twenty first birthday high as shit at a family dinner. The weekend after, I went dancing with my closest friends, all eight of them (nine? ten?) and drank too much. A boy tried to kiss me and even in my drunken, attention-whoring stupor, I managed to both fend him off and tell me boyfriend about it. My boyfriend who is simultaneously my fiance and my ex.
Don't ask.
I just dropped a class because I'm afraid it's going to be too hard. I am telling myself it's because I am trying to avoid stress, I am trying to lead a happier life, but really, I am just scared. I am scared that I am not smart enough, not good enough, like I've been most of my life.
Honesty, right?
Sucks.