index | archives | notes Thursday, Apr. 13, 2006 5:28 p.m. << [ It's a Long Time ] >> Neither of them will give it up, so none of this is really love. My problem is that I want to be first, I want to be the favorite, and even though I know how selfish and irrational and stupid it is, it doesn't stop me from wanting it. I won't be happy with anything less. She passed by me in the hall today, and ignored me to wave at him. I started to cry, and he left to go talk to her. Someone called my name and tried to joke around, since usually I joke back, but when I looked up they just said, "oh," and left it at that. It's been one of those weeks. After school I leaned against a tree and called my mother crying and smoked half my cigarettes and texted him to see if he'd come back, but he didn't. They never do. << | x | >> whatiscopyright.org