index | archives | notes Monday, Feb. 21, 2005 10:20 p.m. << [ Public Broadcasting ] >> I won't give up, and from now on, I'll no longer rely on anyone else. I won't come to anybody with my problems. I'll keep them inside and squish them together until they dry up into a cold, hard ball, where they won't bother anyone anymore. Not even me. Cutting and drinking are officially back in full effect, and I'm disposing of all rules centered around the two. For example, when I used to only drink on the weekends, now, it's any time I think I can get away with it. When I used to not cut when I had a drama performance coming up, or only at night, now I'm doing that whenever too. I just don't give a fuck anymore. Things have officially gone past the "it's not worth it to me to save myself and I'm waiting to see if someone else will save me" stage; we've progressed to the "I don't fucking care if anybody at all saves me because not only is it impossible, but it's also a waste of time" stage. The important thing is to focus on the future. Everyone needs to just stay the fuck away from me. << | x | >> whatiscopyright.org